Being Present: Remembering and Reflecting While Simultaneously Being Lost In The Moment. Do it.

"Forever is composed of nows." – Emily Dickinson

A reflection rather than a rant:

Written in a time and a place long ago, and nearly forgotten.

But, tis better to remember the sentiment of reflection and being present, even in the slippery, dark corners of new motherhood. So...

There is a benefit to reflecting, however, it is only to a certain extent. So long as your reflection is for the purpose of thinking positively about a person and then to pass on those positive vibes into the universe, or to assess the lessons learned from the past experience in order to make better choices in the future, then reflecting is merited. However, ruminating on the past does no one good and can leave you left standing, staring at a door that has already closed while your life begins to pass you by.
Buddha once said, "The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly."
I have always had issues with this...living life looking back at the good times and aching for them, while also thinking hard on the better times that I imagine lay just around the corner. But what about now? Well...let me reflect on now. Right now.
I feel good today. I have no aches or pains. I am not tired. My brain is functioning at a fairly normal speed.
I am in a window office for a change (self chosen due to the fact that I have a dreaded all-day web cam conference starting in about an hour). I get to look outside all day and, what do you know, I see blue skies (for the most part).
I get to go to lunch early today! Yay!
The IT guy got my webcam to work for me and it only took 10 minutes. I was expecting much less. Saves me a ton of hassle.
I received my 0% APR credit card on to which I plan on transferring another balance with a very high interest rate and hopefully aiding me to pay off the remaining credit card debt I owe.
I don't have to pay for lunch today courtesy of my company and due to the fact that I have to sit through an all day web cam conference.
This keyboard is super easy to type on.

Now these are the thoughts that I could've had just now...
I'm stuck in an office at a desk having to do an all day web cam conference.
This conference is stupid because it's a team building conference in which I was only invited to attend via webcam. How are we actually supposed to build team rapport through a virtual meeting? Stupid.
I still haven't gotten my casino costume for our christmas party this Friday and I won't have time because my birthday is tomorrow and that means no time to go run errands.
I hate this job. It's not what I went to school for and I feel with each passing day I am so far from where I was two years ago when I worked as a teacher. How am I going to ever get a teaching job again if my skills are left to deteriorate???
I miss my family and friends back home.
It's cold outside. Even though I see blue, it's actually pretty cold.
I hate cold weather.
I wish I could move to Italy.
Or Hawaii.

So you see, being present in the moment and reflecting on what it is we do have is essential to a sense of appreciation and to overall well-being. Do you see how my negative thoughts were created by either missing something I used to have or by expecting something that I want in the future? I hate the cold because I miss the Texas weather. If I were present in the moment of NOW I could turn that around and think, I appreciate the cold because I'm getting to enjoy actual seasons! This is a real winter!

It's a struggle, and I think it is human nature to be in a constant state of limbo between wanting those things of the past and yearning for a better future. We have to work on becoming awake in the now because, as cliche as it might sound, that is really all we have. A more positive world and society is made by looking at today and thinking about what we can do to make something of it.