Day Fourteen:

Day 14: A picture of you last year - how have you changed?

Obligatory bluebonnet pictures
April 2012

This picture was taken a little over a year ago. I was on the way back from my bridal shower in my hometown of Austin, Texas. Of course we had to pull over to take blue bonnet pics when we saw a patch that seemed worthy of a pic. 

A year ago I was about to get married. I was going through all the frenzied preparation for that big day. I was living in Pittsburgh but commuting often back to Texas for wedding activities, other friend' weddings, and family stuff. It was exhausting. At this point in my life I was so caught up in wedding planning that I don't think I was as focused on me and just enjoying all the little moments. It felt like a blur and I think it made me realize that I needed to work on being more present and in the moment in every step of my life. During this picture moment, all I kept thinking about was where we had to be next, if we were going to be late, if I needed to keep my dress from getting dirty. Looking back, however, this moment was where I should've been most present. Just me and my mom, taking pictures in the flowers off the side of the road. Very few showers or parties or get togethers can beat that.  

This past year has had its ups and downs and its challenges, but it has also made me very aware and for that I am so grateful. I work on it every day. Just today I went outside to eat my lunch on the back deck of my parent's house. I let the dog and cats out and together we just sat, listening to the birds and the tree leaves blowing in the wind and the sound of trickling water from the fountain. At that moment I was so content. I watched a hummingbird flitting from flower to flower and was amazed at its tiny size and bright, beautiful colors. I watched a deer trot through the woods, trying to remain unseen. I watched my animals prowling around, sniffing the air, looking up and down, truly being present with their surroundings. I sat and sighed. I am here in this moment now and don't want to think about anything else on my to-do list, my to-call list, my goals list, or my worry list. I just loved being there and at that moment, just being part of today, and I realized how far I have come from a year ago. 

Be present. Be mindful. Take in your surroundings and forget about the to-do list for a portion of your day. The to-do list will always be there. These moments, though, they are fleeting and it's up to you to take them in, keep them, hold them and enjoy them. 

Day Thirteen:

Day 13: Goals

Lucky thirteen...Goals. 

This is a topic that constantly haunts me. Mostly because I have a list that is a million pages long with ideas that are continually being added, modified, restated and re-prioritized. Also because I have a slight attention problem (I won't go there with the whole self-diagnosing of a clinical label...but let's just say I'm chasing one butterfly after another and they all seem to be zipping around simultaneously). Needless to say, trying to pin down one of these butterflies and really attack it (that sounds vicious...maybe I should've used a different analogy) well, it's been a little difficult. I've tried over and over again to really hone in on my likes, dislikes, aptitudes and preferences in hopes that through this paring down I could find super success in just a couple things. Or even just one thing. Just one thing, I ask! 

So, in case you are still curious, here are my goals. I'm trying to put them in some kind of order of priority but just know it's a wishy-washy ordering system. 

MY LOFTY (AND EVEN NOT SO LOFTY) GOALS

1. Own a house one day 

2. Have a garden that produces not only the majority of our fruits and vegetables, but also useful herbs and beautiful flowers. (I very much enjoy being outside in the garden)

3. Have a dog or two of my own. (There are sub-goals within this category that include rescuing a dog, training a dog to do awesome tricks, go on hikes/runs with my dog,win a cutest dog ever contest, etc). 

4. Start a running club for my elementary school

5. Have a mildly successful photography business on the side

6. Have some sort of job that will take me to Italy every summer (hey! If you dream it, it can become!)

7. Start weekly teacher lunch reward for my class (because hanging out with me is free and possibly the best incentive to good behavior EVER!)

8. Have a cool, cute, smart little family (someday)

9. Be able to give speeches without getting so nervous! (I'm a teacher but that doesn't mean I don't get stage fright in front of adults).

10. Write a book.

11. Have more people read my blog (I suppose I should find interesting things to write about first...working on that)

12. Be an extra in a movie or be a minor part in a cheesy commercial. (Sometimes those look like the most fun gigs ever!)

13. Teach English abroad, even if it is just one time to try it. I've always wanted to do that. 

14. Do a meaningful volunteer project somewhere (rebuilding or renovating homes, caring for sick, elderly, poor or little children, educating, just being a good ambassador). 

15. Host a foreign exchange student.

16. Adopt. 

17. Have backyard chickens and use their eggs.

18. Learn how to cook 5 great meals well enough to never have to look at the directions. 

19. Have an Italian rental property with mia grande amica, Alissa. 

20. Run a marathon (everyone wants to say they've run a marathon).

21. Bike the Great Allegheny Passage

22. Go to Alaska to see whales.

23. Teach dance classes or open up my own dance studio.

24. Work with some organization promoting female empowerment that provides resources, camps, classes, activities for girls. Or start my own. Either or. 

25. Be on Wheel of Fortune or Jeopardy. 

26. Travel to every continent

27. Go on an African safari.

28. Get certified to teach yoga.

29. Play an open mic night somewhere (with my ukelele and me). Even if it's just one time. 

30. See this place: Blue Rock Station

31. Meet any or all of these people and get to actually talk to them: 

• Ellen Degeneres, Amy Schumer, Barack Obama, Maya Angelou, Elizabeth Gilbert, Cheryl Strayed, Natalie Portman, Johnny Depp, Willie Nelson, Conan O'Brian

32. Be pretty good at playing the piano. (Know at least 10 songs to play well).

33. Visit the Florida Keys

34. Go to an EcoRetreat

35. Have a house in Costa Rica (retirement?)

36. Teach my children Italian, musical instruments, geography, manners, cooking and love

37. Travel the world with my family

38. Be the best teacher in the world!

39. Start a Book Club (or join an awesome one)

40. Go to this place: ChicaBrava

41. Exhibit art work.

42. Have a food critique blog

43. Make coffee table photo book

44. Make or participate in one semi-watched you tube video

45. Be there for friends and family when needed...my last goal is just to be a better friend, teacher, wife, sister, daughter and person

Day Twelve:

Day 12: Something you don't leave the house without

Besides the obvious necessities for the day (underwear, clothes, etc.) I normally never leave the house without...

My Running Shoes

Yep. My running shoes go with me pretty much everywhere because I never know when I might find the opportunity to hit the trail. Say I'm running errands and I get done early and it's a beautiful day...trail running! What if there is WAY too much traffic and I'd rather spend 90 minutes walking or running...hello running shoes! Not to mention, I typically try to squeeze in a walk at some point during the day just for stress relief. All good reasons to have the shoes. :-)

Day Eleven:

Day 11: Favorite TV Shows

1. Modern Family

2. Parks and Rec

3. The Office

4. Breaking Bad (BEST show on TV...when it's actually on TV)

5. Tie for Dancing with the Stars (I know, I know) and So You Think You Can Dance ( I love dancing, okay?)

Day Ten:

Day 10: Something You're Afraid Of

I'm afraid of the Coulda Shoulda Woulda Monster.

I'm afraid of being at the end of this road and not having done what I could've, what I should've. All those things left undid, unsaid. All those dreams still floating in my head. 

I'm afraid of being an old lady and wishing I could go climb that mountain, but being remorseful because, alas, it is too late. 

It's not so much death that I'm afraid of, or being old. It's the life unlived. Not having flown. Clipping my own wings because of fear. Fear of failure, fear of making mistakes, fear of making the wrong choices, fear of making a fool of myself. 

"Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free." 

- Jim Morrison 

 My greatest fear is regret, and more specifically dying with regret. 

How's that for an uplifting blog post??!! 

But there's always a silver lining, right? Acknowledging fear, just as the quote mentions, is a step towards freedom. Knowing that I fear this has given me the motivation to get out and do those things that I will regret not doing. 

Day Nine:

Day 9: A Picture of Your Best Friend

Funny Girl

This is one of my besties. I'll allow her to remain nameless. I had a collection of photos to put up here and had to choose one. Yeah, this probably isn't the best one but that's what is so great about this gal. She's actually super dooper incredibly beautiful but the funny quirk she has is that she takes super dooper funny looking pictures. Almost always. It's uncanny. And I love it. I like to put her different funny pics on my phone as the photo assigned to her number so I can have a good chuckle when she calls. I would share the current one assigned to her but it's a little embarrassing so I'll leave it be. 

She's also super dooper quirky funny cool and a beautiful person inside and out. That's why I love her! 

Day Eight:

Day 8: A place you've traveled to...

Perugia, Italy 2002

I traveled to this place in 2002 to study abroad. Little did I know how much it would change my life. The start of 2002 was a weird time to be an American traveling abroad. Many backed out of the trip due to worries following 9/11 attacks just months before. But I stuck with my plans and I'm so grateful I did.

Besides getting to meet awesome people from schools all over the US, who became some of my best friends, I also got to know quite a few international friends whom I have remained friends with even to this day. It's great getting to broaden my horizons by letting people into my life that have such different backgrounds. I find that we can all learn new things through experiencing different cultures, but at the same time I always find that we have more in common than we do differences. 

Beyond that, I learned how to speak Italian close to fluently and was inspired to come back and study a year later (and then went back each year after that until 2005 when my travels ended). This trip basically started me on a journey of travels throughout the world all and I'll never forget and will always appreciate the lessons I learned. 

It was a great way to expand my mind and made me realize the world is a much bigger and much more incredible place than the tiny world I knew back home. It lit a fire within me to see the world and experience new cultures and also gave me a greater appreciation and respect for cultural differences. 

I will encourage my future children to travel as much as they can when they are young (and even when they are old!). It's what makes a life well-lived.